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Now I am 46…

Written by Fiona May 15 2014

I have always hated the “6s”. The 26, 36 and now 46. Looking back it seems incredible that I worried about becoming “late 20s” or even “late 30s”. Now I have crept over to late 40s (or can I say, mid-40s?).

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Crossing the line of the 81-mile Etape Caledonia

Aged 46 I still feel – on a good day – 26. I laugh and giggle with the G-Force, Little Miss and my lovely friends like a carefree 26-year-old. (Was I actually a carefree 26-year-old though?!)

When I’m out walking, running or cycling I could surely pass for 36. I wear sunglasses most of the time so no-one will see the lines of a mid-40s woman. If I put a hat or helmet on the grey hairs disappear. And I am lucky to still be in fairly good shape.

And there’s that word: Woman. I have never felt like I was a woman. For too long, most likely, I held on to the term “girl” in my head. Then I used all other words, gal, lass, female, chick etc to avoid the words woman and lady. Aged 46 it’s hard to avoid being called a woman. Now I think I’ll embrace it.

Years in my 40s have gone by like months. Weeks disappear like days. It’s hard to keep up with the speed of things.

I’ve learned a lot about myself through the decades. I’ve had many, many ups and downs but the rollercoaster appears to have evened out into a generally high but not too bumpy place.

I am far happier now than I have ever been. I am in a great place in life, work and play. I pinch myself that things can be this good and hope they will continue.

I rarely look too far forward. You never know what is around the corner and I have lost too many friends in their 30s, 40s and 50s to plan grand futures. The plans I have with the G-Force are a few years down the line. They are exciting and realistic and I sometimes dare to dream of them!

I have realised that in my mid-40s I am definitely a glass half full person. I like being positive, out-going and energetic. It suits me.

I am frequently stunned, when I stop to think, that I am the mother of a teenager. As many of my friends have had babies over the last year or so, I have entered a very different phase. In some ways it has (so far) been better than I imagined. In other ways there have been struggles that I never envisaged. But I love my caring, horse-mad, as-slightly-bonkers-as-me, very beautiful 15-year-old daughter.

My partner in my 40s, the G-Force, is the best I could have ever hoped for. I’ve had a few, as people will know! Now I share my life with my best friend. We have similar interests, hopes, desires, friends, likes and dislikes and the same silly/great sense of humour.

I cherish my fantastic friends in my 40s.

Last year, aged 45 I had a goal to qualify for the World Age Group Triathlon Championships. I achieved it and racing for Team GB in London last September was one of the highlights of my life. This year I have taken the foot off the pedal of tough training just a bit. I am enjoying my cycling, walking, running and swimming just for what they are – the chance to get outdoors, often with friends and feel the benefits of being fit and healthy in my 40s.  (The G-Force and I do have a goal this July, the Artemis Great Kindrochit Quadrathlon but our training has been haphazard to say the least!)

I doubt I will be saying this at the next “6” but I am going to enjoy this year of the 6. Fifty still seems like a long way off thank goodness although what I have learned though all the 6s is that there’s a big party just a few years away! And I love a party!

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